Thursday, February 07, 2008

My God

I don't talk about my faith or my belief system much. But it is a big part of me an I will be sharing more of it from here on out. I stumbled on to this video a while back, before the darkness came. I went looking for it again today. What I saw was me over the last year struggling against something and crying out to God. It was so powerful for me. I hope it touches you, as well.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Self-care

That's what I've been concentrating on lately. Not actually putting it into practice, so much as, figuring out how to do it. My counselor and I have been discussing it. It's what she suspicions is behind the depression. So, my homework was to make a list of ten things that I could do, that would be "self-care" for me. It was hard for me to come up with ten things but I did and here it is.

1. Exercise- I know that I feel so much better when I get into a routine of this-I just need to do it

2. Read a book- Sounds simple, right? But for me just taking that time for myself is hard

3. Take a knitting class- this is tough because I have to go out of town to take one and I have to come up with the money to take it

4. Piano Lessons- this one I really want, because it is absolutely just for me. So, we are trying to figure out if we can swing it within our budget

5. Manicure/Pedicure- I've not actually had either before but it seems very indulgent to me
6. Massages- I love these

7. Raise Chickens-This one is tough on two levels, first I have to get everyone on board with me, i.e. Husband. Second it costs money!

8. Crafting- I love to craft-knitting, stamping, making cards, sewing, beading. Love, love, love it.

9. Knitting for me-I hesitate to knit things for myself. I tend to knit for others

10. Buy fresh flowers regularly-Especially in the winter months

The hardest part of this is that I'm supposed to do these things even when I feel like I'm not doing my stuff around the house. So, what do you do for Self-care? And how do you feel about doing those things if you aren't fulfilling your other responsibilities?

Aahh, I can breath again

Thank the Lord I am feeling much, much better. I feel like myself again. That dark cloud seems to have vanished. After so long of it being here I kind of catch myself looking for it. But I feel free now. I can tell everyday things are better. Just little things I catch myself doing that I haven't done for so long. So, for me meds aren't the answer. At least not this time. Counseling instead. I'm a talker, go figure. So, maybe now I'll be more active posting? Maybe.......maybe not. LOL